The Conference Finals: Where The Money Is Made

Posted on June 6, 2015 By

Blades of Funny went 2-2 in the 2nd round, and all it took to achieve this averageness was a comeback for the ages. Overall playoff record now stands at 6-6. Average to the core, baby! For the Conference Finals, I’ve decided to switch things up. Instead of looking forward and coming up with wacky storylines,…


Predicting The Future With No “Inside” Sources

Posted on June 4, 2015 By

This post is going to part serious and part humor. The serious part consists of me seriously trying to predict where the top unrestricted free agents will land. The humor part will come on July 1st when all my picks are wrong. Sounds like fun, no?  Let’s go! (Please keep in mind that I’m just…


30 Quotes From 30 NHL GMs

Posted on June 3, 2015 By

Since the season ended, Blades of Funny has had insiders who were inside (thus the name) meetings involving each team’s management. Here are some choice quotes we overheard general managers saying… Anaheim Ducks: “Hey, if we can’t sign Bobby Ryan, let’s just stick a #9 jersey on Matt Beleskey and tell people that Bobby had…


Some Tips For Your Fantasy Hockey League Draft

Posted on June 2, 2015 By

With September just around the corner, it’s time to create a strategy for your upcoming fantasy hockey draft. Here are some tips to get your started… If you decide to draft Tuukka Rask, be prepared for the inevitable “Steve Mason” references from the gallery. Shut ‘em up quickly with a sarcastic “because playing behind Chara…


Season Preview Rankings feat. Drake: #30 to #26

Posted on June 1, 2015 By

For the past five months, I’ve been working really hard to assemble this feature, so please respect these rankings like Brian Burke respects a no-trade-clause. Three quick points I want to make before getting into it… I managed to interview Steve Yzerman and get his input, thus adding instant credibility to the rankings! Drake was…


The Difficult Life Of A Professional Athlete

Posted on May 29, 2015 By

I’m sure this post will upset half the people reading it (meaning 1 or 2 people at the most), but I thought I’d voice a different point of view than the one I’ve been reading since Belak’s death. I like hockey. I like sports in general. And while I stay current with the four major…


Top Secret Playoff Scouting Reports

Posted on May 27, 2015 By

Many of you may not know this, but there is a top-secret scouting organization whose membership is comprised of retired Israeli Special Forces operatives and ninjas. This secret organization is highly skilled at assessing the psychological shortcomings of hockey players, as well as their on-the-ice deficiencies. We’ve learned that there are a couple teams in…


From The Mind Of Vladimir Sharapov

Posted on May 25, 2015 By

(This is a guest post written by Vladimir Sharapov (Владимир Шарáпов). Vladimir works as a baseball scout in his home country of Russia, but his true passion lies in the sport of hockey. We hope that you agree with us when we say that Vladimir will add both a serious and an international opinion to…


The West Is Pretty Playoff Weak

Posted on May 24, 2015 By

Let me start off this post by stating how royally pissed off I am about HBO’s “Luck” getting the boot after a few horses died on set and PETA/TMZ/JACKASSES decided to blow the story up. And, of courses, everyone is piling on now because our society is cool like that. I can just hear the…


Return Of The Mack

Posted on May 23, 2015 By

So I’m back up in the game Running things to keep my swing Letting all the people know That I’m back to run the show 90′s music for the MOTHER EFFIN’ WIN! It’s March 14th. I think Arron Asham has had a long enough run as the face of Blades of Funny —since October 14th for…